Friday, May 21, 2010

My Dream ... My Journey: One

Everyone has a dream.  My dream is to someday write a book … hoping that its depth will awaken in you an understanding of a broken bond.  Perhaps, just for a moment, you will take off the lens you are looking through and see – with your whole self – that what you are judging is not at all what it seems.
  Many do not know our story.  It is one filled with both blessings and curses.  The emotions are still as fresh as the day two beautiful young children entered my life.  Yes, I have two adopted children.  They were born biologically to my youngest brother and his wife.  Caleb was two years old and his sister, Kaetlyn, a mere nine months old when my family welcomed them into ours. We never had fathomed, even for a single second, that they were to become ‘ours’. 
   My brother struggled with substance abuse and ended up incarcerated for a short period of time.  The children’s biological mother also struggled with drug and alcohol abuse and has spent the last nine years in and out of jail. 
   Caleb, who is now a vibrant 11 year old, suffers severe Reactive Attachment Disorder:
     Today, perhaps more so than at any point in history, kids are apt to be separated, ignored, or neglected by their birth parents, shuttled between multiple foster parents and day care workers, or traumatized by physical, sexual, or emotional abuse. Even while physically present, some mothers are yet incapable of providing adequate care and attention for their children.
RAD kids have learned that the world is unsafe, and that the adults around them can’t be trusted to meet their needs. They have developed a protective shell around their emotions, isolating themselves from dependency on adult caregivers. Rather than depending on their parents or other adults to protect them, the protective shell becomes the child’s only means of coping with the world.
Dependent only upon themselves for protection, they come to see anyone who is trying to remove this protective barrier as a threat, not to their emotional well being, but to their very lives. They turn on those who seek to help them the most.
People require attachments with others in order to develop psychologically and emotionally. Attachment is the bond that normally develops between a mother and her child during the first few years of a child’s life. The quality of this bond affects the relationships that a person will have for the rest of his life.
Attachment develops in the early years of life when a mother responds to her baby’s cries by meeting its needs, appropriately feeding, consoling, soothing, and comforting, as well as keeping the infant safe from abuse and harm.
Fundamental to RAD kids is that they haven’t bonded and are unable to trust. They have learned that the adults in their lives are untrustworthy. Trust hasn’t worked for them. Without trust, there cannot be love, and without love they are emotionally underdeveloped. Instead of love, rage has developed within them.
In the first few years of life, at a time even before they have learned to speak, they have learned that the world is a scary place, and that they cannot rely on anyone else to get them through it.
Normal parenting doesn’t work with RAD kids. Neither does traditional therapy, since these therapies are dependent upon the child’s ability to form relationships that require trust, something that is at the root of the problem. Sticker charts and behavioral programs don’t work because the RAD child doesn’t care what you think about his behavior. Natural consequences work better than lectures or charts. Structure is a necessity, but only when combined with nurturing.
While these kids can be healed, they have to want it, and the prognosis is not good. Without healing, these kids grow up unable to form healthy relationships with other human beings. Too often, these kids develop into sociopaths devoid of conscience or concern for anyone other themselves.
     Yes, I cry myself to sleep every night.  As a mother, it is difficult knowing that I can not make my little boy ‘all better’.  I will pray that the Lord guides me as I continue this journey.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Frame ... what's missing?

I'm sitting here waiting patiently for my interview with Fox 44 to air.  I decided to reach out to my blogging friends.  I made this frame for a daycare family.  (My goal is to make one for each family with a child enrolled in my childcare). The background is the lyrics to the song Watching You by Rodney Atkins. When I look at this ... something is missing and I can't quite put my finger on it. Just click on the photo to view it larger! Thoughts anyone?

Monday, May 17, 2010

Flower Packet ....and Recyclables!

Happy Monday!  I think I must be setting a record for myself as far as posting on my blog.  I love my break from school - though it is only for two short weeks, I am taking advantage of the time to post and blog hop!

I managed to complete another milestone and will finally be promoted ... Supervisor!  I couldn't have made it this far without my Stampin' Mom, Michelle Deslandes and my Sister Marie Isom.  Thank you both!

These pictures are from a monthly meeting.  My Stampin' family is so talented.  The first photo is a tissue box decorated by Michelle Deslandes. 

The flower seed packet is a project we all did out our Convention meeting.  I love all of the creations you can put together with a single envelope. 

The very talented Lynette Fresn made this toilet paper album.  I fell in love with it immediately!  She used a hunting theme - her son's first turkey.  The pull out tags were a perfect way to share the moment. 

I'm anticipating a busy week.  My daughter and I leave for Hollywood one week from today!  I won a trip to American Idol!  My interview will be on Fox 44 news tomorrow night at 10 p.m.

I'll share pics!

Thanks for stopping by - happy crafting!

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Blogging bonds ...

There are times in our lives when we feel all alone even when we are surrounded by others.  We laugh, but are not sharing in the laughter.  We hear, but we are not listening.  We are lost in our own measure of time.  Today, however, I found myself believing... believing that everything in my life has Purpose.  I went through ups and downs, trials and failures in order to become stronger.  I was chosen to parent two more children because He knew that no matter what, I would make the sacrifices I needed to nurture them and love them.  I often wonder if visitors even read the blogs we post or if they just click a picture that appeals to them.  Today, I found faith through the blogging world and I send a big thank you to Rebecca (  I love visiting her blog and when I arrived there this evening there was a post titled:  For Samie  (check it out). She made this beautiful card that lifted my spirits.

Thank you Rebecca for renewing my faith!   No matter how steep the mountain - the Lord is going to climb it with you.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Nothing happens by chance, my friend...

There have been days I've wondered what my life would be like had these two beautiful children not joined it?  Please don't gasp.  I am sure I am not alone when I say we map out lives and get settled in.  Some change we just can't anticipate. Nine years ago something happened to  change my entire life - God brought these two children into my home - biologically born to my sibling.  Circumstances brought them to me ... and I became their stability, their hope, their provider, their caregiver ... their Mother.  Tonight I sat at the table twiddling some craft items around and my son, Caleb, approached me, stopped and said "Mom, I will craft with you so you are not alone""  His words meant more to me than can express.  It was those his words came from Him, saying to me that He hears me.  He knows my heart -  and he knows it is filled with love!  Some day perhaps I can share my story.  
       My son Caleb (11) and daughter Kaetlyn (9) made these cards on their own.  They learned how to measure and cut, stamp and color ... and I am one proud mom!
 "Nothing happens by chance my friend ...
Nothing happens by chance, my friend... No such thing as luck. A meaning behind every little thing, and such a meaning behind this. Part for you, part for me, may not see it all real clear right now, but we will, before long. 

Sunday, May 9, 2010

In this world it is not what we take up, but what we give up, that makes us rich.

I remember growing up and feeling emotions that were so conflicting.  I knew the sacrifices that my mother made raising six children alone.  Still, I was pained with jealousy of not fitting in.  I didn't have the name brand clothes or money in my pocket.  I felt jilted and at times even angry.  It wasn't until I became a Mother myself that I truly understood sacrifice.  I realized that my mother may not have given me material things but she gave me a heart filled with unconditional love.  I would not be the person I am today without her guidance and acceptance - her unconditional love.  People tell me that they are amazed at my giving heart and how they can't believe how I "do it all".  What they don't understand is that my zest to love everyone and my need to help everyone is my mother speaking through me.  This past year my mother became ill and called me to come over and call an ambulance for her.  She was having difficulty breathing.  As I watched the ambulance pull away from her driveway I knew that I could not move forward should she not return home with me.  She did have an overnight stay at the hospital and returned home on Oxygen.  I dared not leave her side in fear of losing her.  I know that the Lord blessed me when he gave me her as my mother and that the trials He put us through were so we could truly understand and communicate our love for one another.  My mother is my best friend, my confidante, my lifeline.  I honor her today and every day! 

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Garden from the Heart play!

Even with all of the loads of laundry, housework and dust layers, I managed to remain relaxed most of today!  The stress from having deadlines and research papers was absent and it felt so good.  Though the break between semesters is only two short weeks ...I am going to enjoy every minute of it.  I decided to clean up some craft piles and my excitement of having stamps in my hand with no "must do" overwhelmed me and I found myself sitting down and making a few cards!  I am not sure where I found this card but I loved it and wanted to play around with it.  Here is what I came up with!  (If you are my inspiration please send me a note so I can give you credit!!)
 Though each card looks similar, each one is a bit different.   I love the color combination:  Barely Banana and Perfectly Plum.  The stamp set is Garden from the Heart!  Anyone that loves gardening is going to just fall in love with this set!
Thanks for visiting!

Friday, May 7, 2010

Stampin' Up Bird Punch - a must for all crafters!

It done .... another semester of school behind me and the end that much closer!  What a tough semester.  So many unexpected curve balls.  I've managed to remain intact for the most part.  It is sad to sit back and reflect on the last few months.  I see how much life and its effect on my emotional well being has inhibited my creativity.  I hope to find myself back in the swing of things ... and soon with my first Convention trip around the corner.  I am worried that I will not be able to complete my card swaps and 3d's before it's time since we won't know what is in the new catalog.  How do you all do it? Do you have any pointers to share?
I am not sure who I cased this card from.  I have so many images saved on my computer.  Since this is my first year as a demonstrator I just saved photos all in one file.  I will begin labeling with names so that I am able to give proper credit where it is due. 

                                   Ink:  Rich Razzleberry is definitely a favorite of mine!
                                   XL Bird Punch - so many ways to use this punch.  I love the tulips and just simply punching adding to a card and finishing with a sentiment!

Thanks for stopping by!                           

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Stampin' Up blog is back ...


I have to apologize for being MIA lately.  I was working on my blog trying to figure out how in the world all you bloggers add links to your sidebars.  In doing so, my blog disappeared.  I decided to log on and was prepared to start from scratch when... voila!  My blog is here!  I am not sure I am going to attempt to add links until my sister Marie is feeling better and I can beg her to help me out!
I woke up early on Monday morning and decided the house was quiet and it would be the perfect time to whip up a card or two.  I made the first card and thought "wow, that's plain" so I played around with the Beary Best stamp set and tried a couple of different layers.
This is my final week of courses - definitely stressed to the max trying to get finals done.  I have two weeks off and then it's back for Summer Semester.  I applied for a waiver for the Internship requirements and would appreciate prayers that the college accepts my application.  I really want to graduate in December and have put every ounce of energy I could into getting there!
I hope all is well with my fellow bloggers!  I will catch up on blog posts soon!